Recalibrate
A Transformers filksong written by Stella Quetzacotl
First created: May 25, 2003
Last modified: May 25, 2003

A lament on poor markmanship skills, sung by Optimus Prime and Megatron
To the tune of En Vogue's "Free Your Mind"

~~~~~Legal Stuff~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is a work of fiction written for entertainment purposes only.  All
characters in Transfomers are the exclusive property and copyright of 
Hasbro.  But don't tell the Transformers that.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Megatron:
All I want's one
Vic-tor-y,
But wasted ammo is the norm for me.

Optimus Prime:
It's true the Deceps
Can't hit worth scrap,
But Autobot marksmanship is just as bad.

Megatron:
It seems so stupid
Half my troops don't
Even know which end of the gun to hold.

Optimus Prime:
They'd stand and fire
All day long
With not a hit among 'em; something's really wrong.

Both:
Why, oh why must it be this way
Optimus Prime:
Ratchet is happy but it is driving me batty, I said

Both:
Such is the fate
of leaders like us.
Recalibrate,
for the love of Primus!

Optimus Prime:
Transformers battle
'Bout twice a day,
So why aren't there more patients in the Ark's medbay?

Megatron:
I'm not complaining,
Because, you see,
Most of Autobot fire is prob'ly aimed at me.

Optimus Prime:
When under fire,
I fear no harm,
Deceps can't hit the broad side of an astro-barn.

Megatron:
Just goes to show
What I always say:
It really is so hard to find good help these days!

Both:
Why, oh why must it be this way?
Megatron:
It's about as effective as simply spewing invective, I said

Both:
Such is the fate
Of leaders like us -
Recalibrate,
for the love of Primus!
(repeat)