Year Of the Monkey A Dragonball fanfic written by Stella Quetzacotl First created: Sep 02, 2001 Last modified: Sep 02, 2001 ~~~~~Legal Stuff~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This is a work of fiction written for entertainment purposes only. All characters in Dragonball are the exclusive property and copyright of FUNimation Studios (blargh) and Akira Toriyama. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~Setting~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This is basically my version of what would have happened if Goku hadn't hit his head as a baby. There is some minor timeline skewing in this fic, but nothing major since it's a rewrite of the Pilaf Saga anyway. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~Text Conventions~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ [This is a character thought] *This is emphasized text* Part One: Goku Unleashed Son Gohan cursed. The wild boy who'd been ripping up his forest systematically for almost a year now, whom he'd affectionately called Goku back when his reign of destruction hadn't progressed past a few trees, was stronger than he'd realized. Much stronger. Hard to believe the kid was even human - heck, with that tail he probably wasn't. Gohan had taken the boy in as soon as he'd found him, an infant wandering wild in the mountains that served as Gohan's home, but the kid had run away before three months had passed and Gohan hadn't been able to recapture him since then. This was his third attempt. [I don't know why I'm bothering, anyway,] the old bujutsu master thought. [The boy's been nothing but trouble to me ever since I found him. I've gotten more scars from him biting me than I've gotten in battle.] Gohan knew that for a fact - he'd counted. The monkey-tailed boy powered up, ki flaring about his small form, preparing for another attack. The flame of his battle aura lit up the night, making the forest as bright as noon. Gohan crossed his arms in front of his face and bent his knees as the kid sent a ki bolt flying at him with a wordless cry. He grinned as he blocked the blast with his own ki. "Little punk," he said aloud. "You learned that move from watching me." Goku charged him, snarling, and Gohan sidestepped the attack. Goku may have been super strong and have an instinct for fighting, but inexperience was inexperience. As Gohan answered Goku's attack with a ki blast of his own, Goku shouted a savage kiai and his energy flared brighter than ever. He dodged away nimbly and charged again, this time with both fists out to strike his opponent's torso. Gohan stood firm, letting the boy come almost close enough to hit him - then grasped the boy by both wrists and flipped him over his shoulder. Goku crashed into a tree and landed hard on his back in the dirt with an inarticulate howl. As Goku looked up, shaking off the dizziness from his abrupt introduction to the tree, he saw Gohan standing over him, his face silhouetted by the frame of the full moon. His pupils dilated and he grew still. Gohan half-smiled at the motionless boy lying on his back. "Giving up, already, Goku?" he said jovially. Then he frowned. Goku's expression had not changed, but there was a dark energy gathering around him. Slowly the toddler pushed himself to a standing position, standing hunched like a gorilla, as his tail lashed around him. A growl, too deep to be entirely natural, escaped from his throat. Gohan scrambled back as the humanlike baby exploded in size, ripping the clothes the old man had so meticulously crafted into shreds of brightly-colored thread. The boy grew and grew, coarse brown fur sprouting from some point in his chest and back to flow over his body in waves. His jaws pushed out to form an animal muzzle, complete with canine-caliber teeth, his pupils turned red and melted to spread across his eyes. In the end there was a giant ape, towering over Gohan - and the house, and the trees - where the wild boy had once been. "G-Goku?" Gohan stammered. The ape looked down at him, growled, and opened his mouth. A pink-white beam lanced from the back of his throat, engulfing Gohan in heated pain. The moon set at last, and the sun rose to a wasteland covered in blood and ash and smoke where mountains had once stood. The ape shrank at dizzying speeds, fur giving way to skin, red haze replaced by black pupils, and the monkey-tailed boy appeared once again. He gazed out at the death landscape, lightless eyes betraying surprise and curiosity, but no fear of his power or pride of the way he'd put it to use. Squatting, he dug at the ash and rubble - there was a blood-scent underneath the earth, a scent that might mean food. It didn't take long for him to unearth the Man - the creature that had both attacked him and fed him, engaging both himself and the boy in strange behaviors in the process. The Man coughed, struggled to breathe past lungs that might as well have not been there, and croaked "Goku..." "Go-ku," the boy repeated automatically. He'd learned that when the Man vocalized, he was expected to repeat the vocalizations. Weird, but he'd played along under the promise of food. And right now he was ravenously hungry. "Goku," the Man repeated, then stiffened and abruptly relaxed. His breath left his throat with a sick rattle. The boy prodded him, repeating, "Goku? Goku?" but the Man did not react, did not get up and give him food. At last something in the boy comprehended what had happened. He stood, letting the Man's corpse fall from his arms. "Goku," he muttered, puzzled, as he walked away to search for food. "Go-ku. Gooooo-ku. Go-kuuuuu. Goku." He decided he liked the sound of the word. Bulma frowned at the map. "If there's supposed to be a mountain range here," she asked it, "why am I seeing a barren wasteland?" She peeked up over its edge, to reconfirm her statement. "Mountains don't just disappear. Wait, this isn't a *volcanic* mountain range, is it? Naw, couldn't be." Even so, she frowned at the smoking ruin before her. "Well, I guess it doesn't matter. The radar says there's a dragonball here, so I'm going to find it." Her face set and she nodded. "All right. Goin' in." Despite her resolve, Bulma felt a bit jumpy as she edged her car forward. "This is too creepy," Bulma said aloud. "This place is like a major disaster area." She skirted piles of rubble, her SUV rumbling and bumping over the ash and dirt that was all that was left of life in the mountain range. "I hope a dragonball is worth all this," Bulma grumbled, checking her radar. "Should be right around... here..." She pushed open the car door and jumped out, the impact of her boots sending up a cloud of dust. Goku's ears pirked - something was here, something warm and alive. Something potentially food. He sat up and tugged at his yellow smock - he'd found it after excavating the Man's dwelling and put it on, since the Man had seemed to think it was important. Maybe it attracted food. If it was supposed to, it hadn't worked so far. But maybe it was about to. Goku jumped up and started running, excited at the prospect. Bulma clicked the dragon radar again, squinting against the dust that seemed to insist on blowing into her face no matter which direction she turned. "There's my two," she muttered to herself, tapping the center where two little circles of light showed, "so the third dragonball is... a little bit north..." She oriented herself and looked north. A tower of rubble met her gaze. "Great. Just great." A clatter of rock made Bulma jump. She turned, putting her hand to the gun strapped to her waist - a gesture of reassurance more than anything, as she was inexperienced with the weapon - and scanned the tops of the rubble piles surrounding her. As a result, it was a few moments before she noticed the little boy trying to climb into her SUV. "Hey!" she yelped. "Get away from there!" The boy ignored her. Bulma stomped forward, doing her best to look threatening. "Hey!" she yelled, louder this time. "I said, get *away*!" She raised her hand to swat the boy off his perch on her SUV door. The boy whirled, too quickly for Bulma to react, and tackled her. The force of his assault knocked Bulma back into the hill of dead mountain parts, starting a mini-landslide that half-covered the girl. She had time for one short, panicked shriek before a falling rock knocked her senseless. It was a good thing she did, too - she wouldn't have liked the fact that Goku was snapping her belt from around her waist in order to examine its contents. Something in one of the pockets smelled like food. Systematically Goku popped each pocket off and dumped its contents into the dust, ignoring everything that didn't look or smell edible. Bulma regained consciousness only to have something else smack her skull before dropping into her lap. "Owww!" she howled. "That little brat - " Then she saw what had rolled into her lap. " - Is the greatest!" she finished. "Hah! I found it!" She grabbed the newfound dragonball and held it up. "Three - four! The Sushinchuu!" Goku found the source of that intoxicating scent just as Bulma finished excavating herself. "Hey, you, quit messing with my cologne," she demanded as Goku fumbled with the bottle. "That's my best. Raspberry-scented. And it's all I have for the rest of the summer, so it has to last me - " Goku, thoroughly exasperated, put the vial in his mouth and bit down. Bulma shrieked indignantly as Goku gagged and spat. "Now look, you're gonna end up smelling like raspberries for a week," she scolded. "And where do you get off going through my belt? Especially my dragonballs - sheesh." She went to scoop up her personal items. Bulma managed to grab her pack of capsules and a brush before Goku got it into his head that maybe this funny-looking creature was food. He rushed her, mouth open. Bulma shrieked and dove into her SUV as Goku hit the door head- on with a clang. He howled, jumped up to grip the door top, and Bulma belatedly remembered that her car had no windows or roof - she was easily accessible to attacking monster-boys. She gunned the accelerator, spinning the wheel hard right, and the vehicle jerked and responded, throwing Goku to the dirt. Bulma roared off, gripping the steering wheel for dear life, Goku chasing her down the road until the tireless machine finally outdistanced him on a particularly steep hill. "Aw, *man*! This bites!" Bulma, a safe distance away from where she'd last seen the Monster Boy, kicked at her unoffending SUV's tire. "Lost my dragonballs, lost my radar, lost my makeup and perfume - " She wrinkled her nose at the setting sun. "For all I know that little punk's trying to eat the things." She pulled a capsule from its holder and tossed it with a cry of "Hoi!" As the smoke cleared and a house appeared by the road, Bulma sighed and turned it into a yawn midway. "Can't do anything about it today," she growled. "Just have to sleep on it. Maybe an answer will come up by morning." Bulma shouldered the door open and was just about to enter when a girl's tinny scream cut the evening. She turned, blue eyes scanning the horizon. At first all she saw was the pterodactyl, winging its way across the sky like a great demon. Bulma yelped and jumped inside, shutting the door hurriedly, then ran into the living room to peek out the window. The pterodactyl was chasing a little black-haired girl, scantily clad in a dark blue leather bra (although there was nothing much there for the bra to fill, Bulma noted) and underwear-like garment, pink gloves and boots, with a green cape flying from her shoulders and a pink steel helmet on her head. The helmet sported a gleaming axe-like blade that jutted from her forehead to slope down to nothing at the back of her neck. She was the one who was screaming. Bulma pressed her hands against the glass. "Omigosh," she said, "what do I do? This is crazy! I can't go out there! But - " She bit her lip. The little girl charged, screeching, right up to Bulma's hoi- poi door, forcing a decision. "Lemme in, lemme in!" she screamed, pounding on the door. Bulma opened the door and pulled the girl inside just as the pterodactyl's claws closed where she'd been. Bulma soothed the sobbing child as the 'dactyl banged against the walls outside. "W-won't he get in?" the girl whimpered once she'd calmed down some. "N-naw. You don't have to worry." Bulma smiled at her, shakily. "This is the latest model in mobile housing. Built to last. It wouldn't break even if a flock of pterodactyls came at it." Of course, that particular theory had never been *tested*, but still... "I'm glad," the girl sighed. "I been searching for the Invincible Old Master for a long time... at least it feels long... an' gettin' chased by ever'thing..." Soon she was asleep. Bulma sighed and dumped the sleeping child gently on the couch, covering her with a blanket. [Poor kid,] she thought, noting the condition of her armor and cape. [She's seen a few tough times. Well, that's all right. I'll let her sleep here tonight, and then see her safely off in the morning...] "My name's Chi-chi," the black-haired girl said, taking a sip of her coffee and willing herself not to make a face. "Chi-chi, huh?" Bulma said. "I'm Bulma. Where'd you come from, kid?" "From the east," Chi-chi said, "in Fry-pan Mountain. My dad sent me to find the Invincible Old Master what trained him, so's I could borrow the Basho-Sen t' put out the fire on our mountain." An idea began to tickle in Bulma's mind. "Invincible Old Master?" "Yeah!" Chi-chi sat up. "He's the strongest man in th' world! My dad an' his friend Son Gohan were the last disciples he ever took." "Strongest, huh?" Bulma thought. "An' the best fighter!" Chi-chi enthused. "But..." She glanced at the window. "If I go back out there, I'll just get chased again..." She sighed. "An' I can't go back to my dad without the Basho-Sen." Bulma regarded the girl. [I feel sorry for her,] she mused, nursing her coffee. [But I only have two months of summer vacation left - if I take time off to help her, I might not be able to find all the Dragonballs.] She scowled. [Of course, it might not matter anyway, with that little savage still running around. Unless...] An idea lit her face. "Say, Chi-chi," she said. "D'you think this guy'll have time to help me out once he's given you what you need?" "I guess so," Chi-chi answered slowly. Bulma stood. "That settles it. I'll take you to this Invincible Old Master." Chi-chi looked up, hope shining in her eyes. "R-really? You will?" "Sure, kiddo. I can't very well leave ya to get eaten, can I? Besides - " she grinned - "I need to ask him a favor too." Chi-chi cocked her head. "Wow, really?" Chi-chi cried over the roar of the SUV's engine. "That's so cool!" The wind whipped her hair about her face, and she shook it away impatiently. "Yep," Bulma agreed, not taking her eyes off the road as she drove. "I was lucky to find the first dragonball in my cellar, but after I learned the legend I set right out after the other six. At first I was going to ask for a lifetime supply of strawberries, but I might ask for a super-cute boyfriend. Whaddya think?" "A boyfriend?" Chi-chi thought. "I read about that in a magazine once. You're supposed to go on a 'date', right? An' hold hands an' stuff?" "Not just hold hands," Bulma said proudly. "But sometimes even *kiss*!" "Kiss?" Chi-chi put her hands to her face. "Wow." "Yeah. But this little wild kid ran off with my dragonballs, and I can't get them back from him." Bulma shuddered. "Vicious little twerp. Almost took a chunk out of me." "An' that's why you need the Invincible Old Master?" Chi-chi asked. "Uh-huh. If he clears out the Monster Boy, I can get my dragonballs back." Chi-chi sucked her lower lip, doubtful. "So where does this Invincible Old Master live?" Bulma asked. Chi-chi shrugged. "I dunno." "You don't know? Your dad sent you out looking for this guy and he never told you where he lives?" "W'll, he don't know either." Chi-chi blinked at Bulma. "He sent me b'cause he's gotta stay behind an' protect th' castle." She made a face. "Not like he needs to, what with th' fire and all." "The fire?" "Yeah." Chi-chi slumped over the window. "A while back a fire-spirit fell outta th' sky and onto our mountain. Set the whole thing on fire. An' our castle's on top, so we can't get back to it." "Wow. That's too bad." Bulma pulled a frown. "But why do you need the Invincible Old Master for a mountain fire?" "I told ya, we need to find him 'cuz he's got the Basho-Sen," Chi-chi said impatiently. "Basho-Sen?" Bulma glanced at her. "You lost me, kid. What's a Basho-Sen?" "It's a magic fan he got a long long time ago. It can raise a typhoon with one wave, a thunderstorm with two, and a monsoon with three." Chi-chi nodded, satisfied she'd gotten the order right. "At least, that's what my dad tol' me. The Basho-Sen can put out Fry-Pan's fire easy." "Huh. Sounds like a useful thing to have." Bulma peered up the road. "There's a town up ahead. Maybe somebody there'll know something about the Invincible Old Master." "Ya think?" Chi-chi half-stood to get a better look at the upcoming town. "Sure. It's worth a shot, anyway." As Bulma and Chi-chi entered the village gate, a sense of unreality gripped them in the chest, making Bulma slow her vehicle to a crawl in respect for the eerie silence. For it *was* silent - the houses and yards that lined the main street seemed well-kept enough, but there were no people in sight. The doors were shut tightly, the windows dark or curtains closed. "How wierd," Bulma whispered. "There's no one here. Maybe it's a ghost town." "I dunno." Chi-chi shivered and leaned closer to Bulma. "Somethin's tellin' me - there's people here. I jus' dunno *where*." When Bulma glanced at her, skepticism evident on her face, Chi-chi added defensively, "I kin feel it. Th' people are jus' hidin', that's all." Bulma parked her vehicle on the side of the road and frowned. "Well, I'm not sure if I believe you, kid, but there's really only one way to find out." She pulled off her safety belt and jumped out of the car. "C'mon, let's go." "Go where?" Instead of exiting by the passenger door, Chi-chi undid her own seat belt and crawled across the front to exit through the driver's side door after Bulma. "We'll just knock on a few doors, that's all. If there's somebody here, eventually they'll come out." Bulma shrugged. "Ya think?" "Sure. It's only polite." [Then again,] Bulma thought, [that's just how things work in South City. Who knows what strange customs they've got in this place.] Chi-chi rubbed her nose nervously. "Okay." She followed meekly as Bulma marched up to the nearest house, an igloo-shaped structure whitewashed a blinding ivory. The older girl only hesitated a second before raising a fist and rapping smartly on the red-painted door. Nothing happened. The house remained silent, the windows dark. "Hel-lo! Anybody in there?" Bulma pounded harder on the door. "Come on! I'm not a saleslady or anything!" No reply. Chi-chi hopped from foot to foot. "This's spooky." "Hmph. Maybe they're in the shower or something." Bulma frowned at the impassive door. "C'mon, let's try the next house." She turned and promptly lost her balance as a tremor shook the ground. The two girls fell to the ground amid surprised shrieks, Bulma on her bottom, Chi-chi draped over Bulma's lap. Chi-chi was the first to recover. "Oww," she moaned, scrabbling to her feet. "What was that?" "An earthquake?" Bulma got up and brushed herself off. "Weird, we're hundreds of miles from any fault lines. There shouldn't be any earthquakes in this area." "What if it wasn't an earthquake?" Chi-chi quavered. "What if it was a big tyrannosaur come to eat us?" Bulma snorted. "No dinosaur is that big. It was probably - " Chi-chi never found out what it probably was, for Bulma was interrupted by another thunderous tremor. This time the girls managed to keep their feet, although they were tossed around a bit. Chi-chi rushed into the street to look out the town gate. "I was right!" she yelled, pointing into the distance. "It *is* a big monster come to eat us!" "What? No way!" Bulma raced out to join her, was tossed to the ground by a third mini-quake, got up, sprinted the rest of the way to Chi-chi's side. She stared the way Chi-chi was pointing. "N-no - way - " she stammered. Stomping its way out of the distance was a massive shape, wide and ponderous and muscular. As it approached, Bulma and Chi-chi could make out more details - red skin, glossy black horns like those of a goat, a piglike face. The whole package was wrapped in an incongruous white tuxedo. "M-maybe we should get outta here," Chi-chi stammered. "Y-yeah, I think you're right," Bulma agreed. Neither moved. The creature crashed through the town gate and, seeing the two frozen girls, paused. Then he grinned, displaying a mouthful of sharp teeth, and stamped up to them. "G-g-gh..." Bulma choked out, staring up at the monster. He was easily two stories tall and built like a tank. He peered down at them, black eyes glinting, then straightened and let out a roar that shook the town harder than his footsteps ever did. "The great and terrible Oolong has arrived!" Next chapter: The might of Oolong versus the power of two hysterical girls! Who will triumph?